Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
