I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
