Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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