good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
