He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
