You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Randomize
