Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize
