Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
