Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
it glows. i had to have it.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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