Do vagina's smell?
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
