I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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