Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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