...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Randomize
