i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
