glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Randomize
