i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I am mentally ready for anal.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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