so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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