I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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