Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
and you fell through a lawn chair
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Randomize
