I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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