But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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