Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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