u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I need moral support for this bender
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
You ate ashes out of my bong
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