ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
my liver is dry heaving
Randomize
