I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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