would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
