is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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