Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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