you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
