What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
