yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
