You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Randomize
