bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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