You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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