white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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