They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
