This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
