Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
