I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
