wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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