New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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