nut hugger
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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