what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Girls should come with a carfax report
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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