420 ftw
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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