i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
