i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
