Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
