Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
