we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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