dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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